ווי צו האַנדלען מיט דעפּרעסיע אָן פּילז

“Depression is the worst form of suffering due to an all-consuming sense of shame, a sense of worthlessness, hopelessness and a decline in moral strength. Depression can feel worse than end-stage cancer because most cancer patients feel loved, hopeful, and have good self-esteem. Many patients have told me that they wished for death and prayed every night that they would be diagnosed with cancer and die with dignity without committing suicide,” writes David Burns.

But this most difficult condition can be dealt with, and not only with medication. Burns cites 25 pages of various studies that support the validity of the book’s subtitle, «A Clinically Proven Way to Beat Depression Without Pills.» The psychologist is convinced that with the help of cognitive behavioral therapy it is quite possible to help the patient cope with feelings of shame and guilt, anxiety, low self-esteem and other «black holes» of depression. At the same time, Burns notes that in some cases one cannot do without medication, and in no case does he call for abandoning antidepressants on his own. But his book will help you recognize depression at an early stage and get the better of negative thoughts.

“Depression is a disease and doesn’t have to be part of your life. You can deal with it by learning a few simple ways to lift your mood,” explains David Burns.

The first step is to identify your cognitive biases. There are ten of them.

1. Thinking «All or Nothing». It makes us see the world in black and white: if we fail at something, then we are failures.

2. Overgeneralization. A single event is perceived as a series of failures.

3. Negative filter. Of all the details, we focus on the negative. A fly in the ointment becomes more weighty than a large barrel of honey.

4. Devaluation of the positive. A good, pleasant, positive experience doesn’t count.

5. Hasty conclusions. Even with a lack of facts, we draw far-reaching conclusions, issue a verdict that is not subject to discussion and appeal. We are either sure that someone reacts differently to us, “reading” his thoughts, or we anticipate a negative outcome of events and treat the forecast as a fait accompli.

6. Catastrophe or underestimation. We exaggerate the significance of some things and events (for example, the merits of others) and downplay others (the significance of our own achievements).

7. Emotional rationale. Our emotions are a measure of the reality of events: «I feel this way, so it is so.»

8. Must. We try to motivate ourselves with the words “should”, “must”, “should”, but they contain violence. If we ourselves do not do something with the help of this whip, then we feel guilty, and if others “should”, but do not do it, we experience anger, disappointment and resentment.

9. Self-branding. An extreme form of overgeneralization: if we make a mistake, we are losers, if the other is a «scoundrel.» We describe events in the language of emotions, without taking into account the facts.

10. Personalization. We are the cause of negative external events for which we are not initially responsible. «The child does not study well — it means that I am a bad parent.»

By inviting these distortions into our lives, we invite depression, says David Burns. And, accordingly, tracking these automatic thoughts, you can change your state. It is important to learn to avoid painful feelings based on mental distortions, because they are unreliable and undesirable. “Once you learn to perceive life more realistically, your emotional life will become much richer, and you will begin to appreciate true sadness, in which there is no distortion, as well as joy,” the psychotherapist writes.

Burns offers several exercises and techniques that will teach you how to correct the distortions that confuse us and destroy our self-esteem. For example, the technique of three columns: an automatic thought (self-criticism) is recorded in them, a cognitive distortion is determined, and a new self-defense formulation (rational response) is proposed. The technique will help you reframe your thoughts about yourself if you fail. Its goal is to replace the illogical and cruel thoughts that automatically flood our minds with more objective and rational thoughts. Here are some examples of dealing with such cognitive distortions.

Automatic thought: I never do anything right.

Cognitive Distortion: אָווערגענעראַליזאַטיאָן

Rational answer: Nonsense! I do a lot of things well!

*

Automatic thought: I’m always late.

Cognitive Distortion: אָווערגענעראַליזאַטיאָן

Rational answer: I am not always late. I’ve been on time so many times! Even if I am late more often than I would like, then I will work on this problem and figure out how to become more punctual.

*

Automatic thought: Everyone will look at me like I’m an idiot.

Cognitive Distortion: Mind reading. Overgeneralization. All-or-nothing thinking. Prediction error

Rational answer: Some may be upset that I’m late, but it’s not the end of the world. The meeting itself may not start on time.

*

Automatic thought: It shows what a loser I am.

Cognitive Distortion: פירמע

Rational answer: Come on, I’m not a loser. How long have I succeeded!

“Writing down negative thoughts and rational responses can seem like a monstrous oversimplification, a waste of time, and an over-engineered undertaking,” the author of the book comments. — What’s the point of this? But this attitude can play the role of a self-fulfilling prophecy. Until you try this tool, you will not be able to determine its effectiveness. Start filling out these three columns for 15 minutes every day, continue for two weeks, and see how it affects your mood. Most likely, the changes in your image of yourself will surprise you.

Source: David Burns’ Mood Therapy. A clinically proven way to beat depression without pills” (Alpina Publisher, 2019).