ינהאַלט
Lola, 6, comes with her mother to Anne-Laure Benattar’s office. The little girl seems very calm and gentle. She observes the room and especially the corners. His mom explains to me that for a few years now, spiders have scared him, and she asks that her bed be checked every night before going to sleep. She thinks about it almost all the time since they moved into this new house and has “fits” regularly.
Both adults and children can be affected by phobias. Among these, the extreme fear of spiders is very common. It can be disabling, since it produces reactions that prevent normal living.
The session with Lola, led by Anne-Benattar, psycho-body therapist
Anne-Laure Benattar: Tell me what’s going on with you in relation to …
Lola : Do not say anything ! Do not say anything ! I’ll explain it to you … The word scares me! I look everywhere I go in the corners and also in my bed before sleeping …
א.-לב: And what if you see one?
Lola : I scream ! I leave the room, I am choking! I’m afraid of dying and I call my parents!
א.-לב: Oh yes ! It’s very strong ! Is it since the move?
Lola : Yes, there was one in my bed the first night and I was very scared, in addition I lost all my friends, the school that I liked and my room …
א.-לב: Yes, moving is sometimes painful, and finding one in bed too! Do you want to play a game?
Lola :Oh yes !!!
א.-לב: You will first think of a time when you are serene and confident.
Lola : When I dance or draw I feel very good, strong and confident!
א.-לב: It’s perfect, think back to those very strong moments, and I put my hand on your arm so that you keep this feeling with you.
Lola : Ah, that feels good!
א.-לב: Now you can close your eyes and imagine yourself in a cinema chair. Then you imagine a screen on which you see a still image in black and white before the move, in your room. You let the movie go on for a while, until the “problem” is resolved and you feel so much better. You take the feeling of serenity and confidence with you during this film and you stay comfortable in your chair. Let’s go ?
לאָלאַ : Yes ok, I’m going. I’m a little scared… but it’s ok… That’s it, I finished the film. It’s weird, it was different, like I was far away in my chair while another me was living the story. But I’m still a little afraid of spiders, even if the word doesn’t bother me anymore.
א.-לב: Yes that’s normal, me too a little!
לאָלאַ : There’s one in the corner there, and it hardly scares me!
ALB: If you need to be a little more serene, we can continue the exercise with two other steps. But this step is already very important.
What is a phobia? The decryption of Anne-Laure Benattar
A phobia is the association of a fear with a particular object (insects, animal, the dark, etc.). Very often, the fear can refer to the context of when the problem first occurred. For example, here the sadness of the move and the spider in the bed were associated in Lola’s brain.
The tools to help Lola overcome her phobia of spiders
PNL Dissociation Simple
The objective is to “dissociate” the sadness from the object of fear, and this is what this exercise allows, in its simple version, in order to be able to apply it at home.
If that’s not enough, we must consult a therapist specializing in NLP. One or more sessions will be necessary depending on the other issues that the phobia may hide. In the office, the exercise is a little more complex (double dissociation) with a more complete release.
באַק בלומען
Bach flowers can provide relief for extreme fears: like Rock Rose or Rescue, a relief remedy from Dr Bach, which alleviates intense anxieties and therefore phobic reactions.
אַנגקערינג
An “anchoring” on a part of the body, on the arm for example, of a pleasant feeling, such as serenity or confidence, makes it possible to better live a particular moment by connecting to the resource.
טריק: The anchoring can be done by the child himself and reactivated regularly to gain confidence in certain situations. It is a self-anchoring.